We can’t rest on our laurels, though. We have to continue to present a fresh and different outlook that can blow away our competitors. It’s a cut-throat business the business blog business. Many respected pages have already passed into history. I chaired the monthly meeting where we could discuss and possibly implement new measures to keep ten steps ahead of the opposition.
In attendance were myself, the sub-editor and my secretary. Before we go any further my secretary is the hard-working lady in the header. She seems destined to be forever climbing the paper mountain. She is called Hillary. Her parents named her after Edmund Hillary, I’d guess. The sub-editor shall remain nameless. Here are some selected minutes from said meeting.
Sub: Why don’t we sell advertising space on this page?
Me: We’ve went through this before. I’m not selling out to shady organisations like the Olive Oil group. If we let them in just even one little bit, they’ll swallow us up like they did the Marmot Foundation and we’ll be nothing but a subsidiary.
Sub: Cool, then I’d be a subsidiary sub-editor.
Hillary: Has anyone seen the Expat United file? I thought I’d logged it under blue chip companies.
Me: Hillary, come down from there for a minute. Go. Jump. I’ll catch you.
(She jumps. I catch her. Don’t tell Mrs W)
Sub: Horoscopes are the future. We should publish a weekly chart with good news for all twelve star signs.
Me: No way. This website has always dealt in hard truth. At no time have we strayed into fantasies and I’m not going to start now. If we take our eye off the ball for a second and start making things up, the readership would never forgive us.
Sub: OK then, what about a cartoon strip? All newspapers have them.
Me: Too expensive. Have you seen the prices for one of the big franchises? It costs a bomb to run a Hagar the Horrible strip. As for Sylvester and Tweetie-Pie, forget it. That darned canary and his exotic islands would bankrupt us.
Hillary: Why don’t we make our own? After all, we have always prided ourselves on our originality.
Me: Hillary, I think I love you. (Don’t tell Mrs W)
BARRY THE BRONTOSAURUS 1.1
9 comments:
I like cans.
I used to be can-do, but now I’m just candid.
:-)
Candid indeed, CI.
I quite like the can-can.
I think you are canny. My OED tells me that the word canny means shrewd, especially in financial or business matters. And in Scotland it also means pleasant; nice.
So you are doubly canny, JW! Yippee!
:-)
Excellent pacy drama, JW, with thigh-slappingly hilarious cartoon!
Do you & Hillary make them into Christmas cards too? And what an opportune moment for an advent calendar, featuring Barry and his Ginormous Friends.
I think the laughter in the cartoon is uncanny.
:-)
Thanks CI, you're also a canny lad.
Cheers Dolores,
I have now been reduced to drawing my jokes. Definitely will have to outsource the artistic duties to a more skilled cartoonist.
Christmas cards and calendars, that sounds great. But I'm thinking big. I'm just waiting on Disney productions to buy the rights to a big screen extravaganza. Wishful thinking.
:-)
Outsourcing,JW? Pchaw! With Talent like yours, Kid, the sky's the limit - think Big, think Crunchy, think - The Jungle Book meets Jurassic Park...
Dolores,
You are a very nice person. One of the nicest I've ever had the pleasure to speak with (and you need to see an optician). In your honour a future Barry the B script will include a marmot.
Why JW (coy gasp), how Fab! Marmot would like to thank everyone and Barry for getting him in the movies.
Do you have room for a Very Nice (and Gorgeous) extra, perchance? I think I mentioned only recently, that I can touch my nose with my toe...
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